Creating a safety plan
Safety planning: how to say safer during family violence
If you’re experiencing family or domestic violence, many people will urge you to ‘just leave’. But often it’s not that simple. According to Full Stop Australia, leaving an abusive relationship permanently can take six attempts on average. Each time, you get stronger, braver and more prepared.
If you’re concerned about violence or controlling behaviour from a partner, ex-partner or other relationship, one practical thing you can do is make a safety plan. This set of steps can help you reduce risk, stay safer, and act quickly if things get worse.
Knowing you’ve got a strategy in place can help you stay in your “green zone” of coping, rather than tipping into crisis so you’re better able to act when you need to.
What is a safety plan?
A safety plan is a practical tool that helps you identify what you’ll do if the violence or abuse escalates. It involves thinking ahead and answering questions like:
· What will I take?
· Where could I go?
· Who can I call?
It’s not only for people who are leaving a relationship. It’s useful whether you’re staying in the home, thinking of leaving, or have already left.
Building your safety plan
1. Start by identifying warning signs and risk
Reflect on what tends to happen before things get worse: changes in mood, increased controlling behaviour, new threats. These cues help you move from recognising the risk to acting.
2. Build your support team
Select people you can trust: a friend, family member, neighbour or colleagues. Tell them you might call if you feel unsafe.
Let them know how you’d like them to respond. You could even have a code word so they know when you say it, you need immediate help.
3. Prepare your safe exit options
Choose a safe place to go if you leave home in a hurry (friend’s house, refuge, community service). You might need an emergency bag packed which should include your identity documents, money/ bank cards, phone charger, keys, medication and clothes. You could also consider an alternative phone/SIM card and personal items like jewellery or keepsakes.
4. Increase safety at home
Make sure you always keep your phone charged and have safe numbers saved under a code name.
You could asked trusted neighbours to keep an ear out and ask them to call 000 if they hear fighting or violent behaviour.
Make sure you check your online safety. You might need to clear your browser history, set strong passwords and disable location tracking on your phone and devices.
5. Review and adapt your plan
Your situation may change when you move, separate, have children, or change jobs, so revisit your plan regularly.
Special considerations for children and pets
If you have children, choose a code word for emergencies and have a plan of where they will go if you need to leave quickly. Teach them how to call 000 and where they can go if they feel unsafe.
If you have pets, don’t forget to include them in your plan. Abusers often use pets to control. Some services provide pet-friendly refuge space, or you could talk to family and friends about caring for your pets temporarily.
What to do now?
You don’t need to build your safety plan alone. In fact, many organisations recommend getting support from a counsellor, health professional or support worker when drafting it.
Some organisations that can help include:
· 1800 RESPECT on 1800 737 732 (or 0458 737 732 for SMS) for free, confidential and available any time.
· FullStop Australia or 1800 385 578
· Call 000 in an emergency
References:
https://dvac.org.au/our-services/safety-planning
https://1800respect.org.au/help-and-support/safety-planning/checklist
https://fullstop.org.au/get-help/something-happened-to-me/making-a-safety-plan
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